What Truly Counts
by pandorabox82
Summary: Bernie had found the perfect gift for Serena, months before Christmas. But when the time comes to give it to her, she can't find it. Will she be able to find something just as good to give her girlfriend?


Bernie smiled as she picked up the surprisingly heave glass paperweight, holding it up to the light so she could see the way the spirals of glitter and color were picked up. The blues reminded her so much of Serena's calming presence in her life that she knew she had to get it for her for Christmas, even if it was only the middle of August. She knew, in her heart, that she wouldn't find anything more perfect for the woman, no matter how hard she looked.

Clutching the paperweight tightly, Bernie continued to mill around the shop, knowing that she had some time to kill before she met Serena for supper. A few other baubles caught her eye, second best gifts that might have worked for her friend, had she not found the paperweight. Finally, she had fifteen minutes to spare, and she made her way up to the clerk, handing her treasure over.

"Is this going to be a gift?" Bernie nodded. "Do you want me to wrap it?"

"I'm not giving it until Christmas, so no. But thank you." Bernie gave the woman a small smile as she rang her out, and she as she paid, she wondered where she would keep the paperweight so that she would remember where it was come December. She was still wrapped up in her thoughts as she left the shop and began to head to the restaurant.

Somehow, she managed to reach the door at the same time as Serena, and she fought to keep from hiding the bag, knowing that the move would only create suspicion in her friend's mind. "Ooh, did some shopping, did we?" she asked as she threaded her arm through Bernie's. A slight thrill of pleasure coursed through her body, and she fought to tamp it down, knowing that there was no possible way that Serena felt the same burgeoning feelings that Bernie had. Still, she was going to relish these moments for all they were worth, since Serena's friendship did mean so much to her.

"I found something for the flat, yeah."

"Well, you'll have to invite me by to see it," Serena replied as they stepped inside and were quickly shown to a table towards the back of the restaurant. Bernie nodded dumbly as she took a seat across from her friend, tucking the bag under the table as Serena ordered them a bottle of Shiraz. "You missed one hell of a shift today. I am absolutely knackered."

"I won't keep you long, then," she started to say, only for Serena to reach out and grab hold of her hand. "Serena?"

"I'm choosing to spend time with my friend. Please, tell me about how your day went." Serena squeezed her hand lightly before letting go and resting her chin atop it as she gazed at her. Bernie let out a light sigh as she nodded, returning the bright smile with a small one of her own. And then she fell into an easy conversation with her friend, trying to give her the highlights of the lazy day off she'd had.

"It has to be here somewhere," she muttered under her breath as she rooted around the top drawer of her desk. Cameron came into the office, a perplexed look on his face as she turned her gaze upon him. "I can't find it!"

"Find what, Ms. Wolfe?"

"We're in the office, you can call me Mum. Did you happen to scrounge around in my drawer here, and find a heavy, glass, expensive, paperweight?"

"When would I have time to do that, Mum? And besides, I know enough not to take anything that is obviously yours. Why is it so important?"

She plopped down into her chair and raked her fingers through her hair, dislodging the bobby pins that were holding it back, as she stared unseeing at the desk. "It is five days until Christmas, and I've managed to displace Serena's gift. It was absolutely perfect, and I could have sworn that I placed it in here, so that I would know where it was when the time came. Would you mind taking a looksee for me? Just in case my eyes have gone blind."

Her son nodded as he made his way over to her side, moving things around as he looked. "What does it look like?"

"Like a round paperweight, maybe five inches in diameter, weighs about a kilogram. It should be quite obvious if it's there!" She could hear hysteria rising in her voice, and tried to take a few calming breaths. And it would have worked a lot better had Serena not bustled into the room at that moment, and Bernie gave her a panicked look.

"Is everything okay?" she asked as she looked between the two of them.

"Just peachy," Bernie replied, unable to keep from shaking her head a little. Serena pursed her lips slightly as she took a seat at her desk and tapped away at her keyboard. "Right, Mister Dunne, you need to get back out on the ward and continue your rounds with Doctor Digby."

"Yes, Ms. Wolfe." He gave her a tight nod before leaving the room, and she let out a loud breath.

"That does not sound like everything is okay. Honestly, what is wrong? Did something come up that will take you away from me tonight?"

Bernie forced her face to soften into a sweet expression. "No, darling, I wouldn't miss our Christmas together for the world. I know how pressed for time we're going to be this holiday season after all." Inwardly, she was still panicking, since according to the clock, she only had five hours to find a second perfect gift for the woman she loved. "Now, I'm going to head out to lunch a little early, and I might take a little longer than expected."

Serena frowned a little as she looked up at her. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

"I wish, but this is going to be all on me. If I don't get the chance to see you before tonight…" Bernie got up and crossed to Serena's side of the office, bending down and ghosting her lips across her lover's cheek. "I know, I'm trying to keep the PDAs to a minimum, but you look like you needed a kiss just now."

"And that is why I adore you, Bernie." Serena gave her a wider smile as let out a pleased purr. "I hope you find everything that you're looking for on your break."

"I hope so, too."

Bernie stepped out of the office and checked in on her patients, watching as Serena made her way into theatre twenty minutes after their conversation. That seemed to be her cue to take her leave of the ward, and she went up to Raf, giving him a sheepish smile. "And that is the look of a woman who needs something."

"You would be right. I've gone and done something completely ridiculous, and managed to lose the perfect Christmas gift, and I only have five, well, almost four, hours to replace it with something that is not quite the pinnacle of excellence."

"Oh, that's right, you and Serena are having your personal Christmas tonight. I'd almost forgotten. But how did you manage to lose it?"

"I have no clue. I could have sworn that I placed it in my desk for precisely that reason – to not lose it." Bernie shook her head a little. "And I really have no idea now what to give her. I've gone into panic mode, which clouds my judgment."

Raf reached out and rested his hand on her arm, giving her that annoying, knowing, smirk of his, the one that said he had very important things to tell her. "She loves you, Bernie, so whatever gift you give her will be loved. Because you're giving the gift. Trust your instincts, they'll never steer you wrong."

Bernie fought to not roll her eyes, and he laughed gently, seeming to know what was on her mind. "I'll take your advice to heart, Mister di Lucca. Now, Serena knows that I'm going to be gone a little longer than normal, but if there is an emergency, do not hesitate to page me."

"Of course, Bernie. And remember, what's done from love is always received with love."

It was a pretty sentiment, one that wasn't always true, but she nodded anyway, knowing that Raf meant well. "I'll keep that in mind," she said as she nodded to him before heading back into her office and grabbing her purse and coat. It didn't take long to get back to the locker room and change back into her street clothes, and then she was heading out to her car.

Her first instinct was to head back to the shop where she had picked up the paperweight. There had been a few other things that had caught her eye, and perhaps one of them would work out. The drive didn't take too long, and she popped into the shop with few expectations. "Back again, luv?"

Bernie turned her head to see the same clerk from a few months ago, and she gave a small nod. "Last minute Christmas shopping," she said as she headed back to where the paperweights were. There was a new selection available, and whilst they were all beautiful, none of them called out to her, none of them said Serena quite like the first one had. Letting out a small groan of disappointment, Bernie disappeared further back into the shop, hoping that something would catch her eye.

An elegant ceramic sculpture finally got her attention, and she drifted towards it, a tiny smile dancing about her lips as she picked it up and ran her fingers along the wings of the angel. It wasn't quite as perfect as the paperweight, but she knew that Serena would like it nonetheless. Going up to the register, she queued and hummed under her breath as she waited, thinking about the night ahead. She dearly hoped that Serena appreciated this last minute gift, and that she would understand her momentary lapse in memory.

"All right, last time you didn't get your item gift wrapped. Since Christmas is right around the corner, would you like me to this time?"

Bernie marveled at the woman's good memory, and gave a small nod, thinking about the last gift she had wrapped for Serena. It was a patch job, that much was certain, and it would help to have it professionally done this time around. "I should have had you do that last time around. Maybe then I wouldn't have misplaced the first gift."

"Oh, you didn't!" Bernie nodded once more. "That is the worst luck. Here, fill out this card whilst I get this boxed up and wrapped." She slipped over a festive card, and Bernie picked up the pen, scrawling out a message of love to Serena before signing her name and drawing a little heart. As she stared at the card, she wondered why she had been so sentimental, but there was nothing doing, now. The heart was there, and she couldn't cross it out. "All right, I'll just affix the card to the front, and then ring you up."

Bernie rummaged through her purse to pull out her billfold, taking out her credit card and paying when prompted. "I'll take better care of this gift. After all, I've only a few hours until I give it to her this time, rather than a few months."

The clerk nodded as she placed the wrapped gift in a bag, handing it over. "Have a happy Christmas."

"I certainly hope that it shall be." She smiled as she made her way out of the shop and drove back to the hospital. After parking in her spot, she took a few deep breaths and slipped out of the car, heading in to Pulses and picking up two coffees before heading up to AAU. Serena happened to be passing by at that moment, and their eyes met. "I was going to leave this for you on your desk, but look at this."

"Fate is quite kind sometimes." Serena took one of the cups from her hands and lifted it to her lips, taking a long sip. "And this is perfect. I have some very good news for us."

"Oh? What would that be?"

Serena smiled at her above the rim of her cup, looking thoroughly adorable. "The doctor who was taking over for us decided to come in early, which means that as soon as you sign off on your patients, we are free to go home. Jason will have started the roast, since it needs to slow cook for a few hours, which means we won't be able to eat right away, but I get to spend more time with you. Could there be anything more perfect?"

She shook her head as she fought the urge to lean in and kiss Serena's cheek. "It's absolute heaven," she finally replied before sipping at her own coffee. Still, she felt free enough to reach out and brush her hand against Serena's arm as she walked by her to step into their office. Taking another long drag of her coffee, she dashed out into the ward, eager to get through her rounds so that she could go home to Serena and Jason.

It still took her thirty minutes to finish up everything she needed to do, and by the time she got back to the office, Serena was already gone. On her monitor, though, was a note from her lover. She smiled as she traced the simple _I cherish you_ on the paper, a warm feeling of love rushing over her heart.

Leaving the note in place, she shrugged into her coat before shouldering her bag and heading out. "Have a good evening, Raf!"

"You, too, Bernie." They nodded to each other, and she made for the stairs, knowing that it would be faster in the long run. Thankfully, she didn't meet anyone on the way down, and she was soon outside, jogging over to her car to see another note under her windscreen. _I am twitterpated with you_.

Another silly smile curved her lips upwards as she plucked the note up and held it to her heart as she slid behind the wheel of her car. She hummed along to the Christmas songs on the radio as she drove, her thoughts occupied with Serena. As she pulled into Serena's drive, she waggled her fingers at Jason when she noticed him in the front window.

Serena, though, was the first one out the door to rush to her side, opening the door and reaching in for her hand. "You're finally home!"

"Sorry, it took a bit longer than expected." She took hold of the shopping bag and followed Serena inside, never letting go of her hand. "But why are you so anxious to have me here?"

"I missed you." She sighed against Serena's lips as she accepted her sweet kiss. "That's all the reason I need to be anxious." Serena gave her another quick kiss as she led her into the sitting room. Since the last time she'd been there, a large tree had appeared, decorated with silver and gold filigree ornaments and white fairy lights. Along the fireplace was a pine bough garland, with accents of gold and silver. And then, her eye was caught by a very familiar object.

"I thought I lost that. I have been scouring my office for that, and went out to get you another gift, because this one went missing."

She turned to face Serena, immediately taking in the guilty flush on her cheeks. "I needed something from that drawer, when you were off in Kiev, and the box had my name on it. I couldn't help but take it as mine. It was beautiful, and it reminded me so of you and the waves of sea, all stormy, and yet so beautiful. I kept it on my office here, where I could stare at it and remind me that even though we were apart, you were like the sea, always there, always lovely, always loved."

Serena's voice had dropped to a whisper as the space between them had closed. Carefully, Bernie set the bag on the floor before wrapping her arms around Serena's waist, holding her close as she captured her lips in a warm kiss. Bernie groaned against her lips as Serena's hands dug into her hair, pulling them tighter together. Finally, they ended the kiss, and Serena let out a long breath before resting her head against Bernie's chest. "The moment I saw that in the shop, I knew it was meant for you. Because in it, I was reminded of your constancy, your calming spirit, your faithfulness. Happy Christmas."

"Happy Christmas, Berenice." They let out a long sigh of contentment as Serena led Bernie over to the settee, pulling her down as they watched the fire in the fireplace, the peace of the season descending over Bernie's heart like a balm. She was so glad that this was shaping up to be the happiest Christmas she'd had in years.


End file.
